This Drifting Excrement Was Way Too Meaningful! It's the TV Disappointments of the Year.

Looking back, we reflect on the TV landscape of the recent year, a selection of shows emerge not for their brilliance, but for their notable shortcomings. Ranging from awkward spin-offs to confusingly poor docuseries, here are the programmes that had us scratching our heads or just reaching for the remote.

The 'Sex and the City' Sequel

Where to begin with this love/hate follow-up? Plagued with woeful writing, painful arcs (justice for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the series fought to justify its existence. For a moment, as the third season started, it looked like it had at last hit its stride. Then arrived an installment centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the creator announced this would be the last season. It ended on a low point; the closeup of Miranda’s toilet flooded with poo was simply too on-the-nose. Still, fans undeniably had a hoot picking apart every single “wtf?” episode. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – danced around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t let out a little sob?

All’s Fair

‘Can Kim Kardashian act? Of course she can’t.’

But that was practically the smallest of this show's problems. The subject of a exceedingly uncommon no-star review, it was difficult to know where to start enumerating the problems. The laughably wooden dialogue? The mind-numbing veneration of wealth and consumption? The almost wilful procession of cliches? Performances so poor they felt borderline malicious? Let’s just say “each and every one” and never speak of this series again. However, a second season has been commissioned, so we’re probably going to have to.

The Charlie Sheen Documentary

Considering the restraining orders, domestic violence claims and parental shortcomings, it’s fair to say Charlie Sheen has been a troubled figure. Not you’d truly have gleaned it from this multi-part documentary which chuckled along at Sheen’s various bouts of self-destructive hedonism while struggling to tell us a single thing we weren't already aware of. Instead, it felt as if this loose cannon was being indulged, so any sympathy this show might induce should be reserved for the people who have had to endure close contact with this charismatic but dismissive egotist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Naturally we understood it was preposterous from the get-go: a thriller about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or annihilate all of humanity. We stuck with it out of pure love for its leads … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One scarcely cared when his character died, and the other ultimately hacking Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. That's what you call giving up the ghost.

MobLand

Shady figures meeting in deserted boxing gyms? A certain band's Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its gangland drama back.

In truth, that is unfair on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many seem a bit old-fashioned now, but at least they didn’t endure the embarrassment of having to indulge unconvincing dialects. But there were many other problems. Mainly that it was just really boring; a conflict over drug-selling territory between various cockney rogues which felt rather simplistic.

With Love, Meghan

Considering the extent to which she provokes the ire of certain performatively angry commentators, it’s almost tempting to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s televised ventures into quaint lifestyle as intentional provocations. But then you view them and are compelled to admit that in this case, they might have a point. It’s like watching a homeware magazine animated; a meme for evening drinks with delusions of grandeur; a procession of sleeping dogs, humming beehives, sentimental platitudes and forgettable crafting “hacks” you’ll forget instantly. All supported by immense, mostly unearned wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are obviously fascinating things to be discussed about both Victoria Beckham and her journey with vocation, identity, self-worth. But for some reason, this documentary series chose not to explore them. Instead, the experience was akin to reading a sales catalogue. She obviously has good reason to resent what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But sadly, she failed to do herself any favours with this guarded letdown of a series.

The Inheritance

It had the potential to be the next big hit – except even camper, with a glamorous star as a deceased benefactor and a well-known personality managing her estate. What more could you want? As contestants competed, there was plenty of betrayal and arguing. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s even now too complicated to detail what precisely was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via prerecorded videos. The show ended up reeking of a programme that was trying way too hard to live up to something way beyond it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How do you follow a show that defined a generation? The pressure was enormous for this starry romcom about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who lands in London with a shattered romance. The lead actress took her biggest role by the horns and was a delight to watch, reveling in Jane Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very slick and, paradoxically, was not enough. Plus, the abundance of celebrity cameos involved felt icky.

The Sketch Show Return

Not good enough to be ‘patchy’.

Given the shrewd recruitment of talented younger comics, expectations were high. But sadly, most of it fell flat. A particular sketch was a one-note joke stretched to a husk but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a familiar ranting mode. The writing room sketches, in contrast, simply inspired the idea that they should probably have remained in there a while longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively presented the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an compelling drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this was not it. The material needed to be treated with care. Instead, the series struggled painfully to find the right tone, lurching from strangely breezy, slightly mannered farce to inevitably, real-life horror. Complex? Arguably. A total mess? Very much so.

The Maths Genius Thriller

We admire the lead actor … but did we buy him playing the most brilliant maths genius in history, a man so smart he’s on the brink of a breakthrough that could destabilise society? No! This international thriller about secret services targeting – and eliminating – intellectuals frankly got more farcical by the second. Formulaic nonsense.

1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story

This uncritical portrait followed the online personality renowned for sexual escapades as she undertook her biggest challenge yet. What on earth would possess her? What we wanted was far greater interrogation of her true psyche, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have spoken to the legendary mum who appeared to drag her son out of the queue. What we got was horrific imagery and absolutely no interrogation of her notoriety whatsoever. And to think, the documentary-maker has a teenage daughter too.